Tomorrow at 2:00 we will leave the hotel to meet
I don’t feel like I would have imagined. If you had asked me a month ago what tonight would have felt like I would have described butterflies and anxiety and excitement and joy. But I find myself somewhat sober. Sort of not wanting tomorrow to come in this weird sort of way. I guess maybe what it boils down to is that I am scared. I am scared about having 4 kids, scared about parenting
I think that’s where I’m at tonight. The realities are looming over me and I am feeling very weak. Very not together and not so ready for this journey. Of course, being in a foreign country and surrounded by the unfamiliar doesn’t help…but it is more than that. The weight of A-D-O-P-T-I-O-N is heavy, the idea of taking a child from all that they have ever known and promising to raise them and see them through all the twists and turns that adoption brings. Add in there a different race, a different language, a different culture…it is a lot. I know it is what God wants us to do, and I know that
I open up our suitcase and see her clothes and toys and my heart leaps. I close the suitcase and look out the window to a world so different than mine and I am quieted. Life is about to change – for her, for me, for our family.
Dear Jesus, help us to love one another well. Through the good days and the bad, the happy and sad, allow us the grace to persevere and the patience to see your hand.
We will update with pictures of our new little girl as soon as we can!
Wow…it is really happening.