I was so overwhelmed thinking about Lydia today at church. My heart was so heavy. Is this the day of her conception? Surely not her birth? Maybe her mom was deciding whether to keep her. I don't know but I couldn't get rid of the picture and the intense need to pray. Sometimes I feel like I am psycho - so in love with a girl that I don't even know. And really don't even know if I will know her.

I know this is going to be a faith journey. And when we walk through the door with Lydia we will have a huge God story to tell.

Oh God, make our path so clear. Remove hindrances and bring us confirmations. Thank you that you love us so much.

UPDATE: Lydia's birthday is listed as 12/28/2005 but that is a guess. She was not given up until mid-March and so her day of birth is a mere estimate. I think she was probably born on January 22, 2006. I believe with my whole heart that I was praying for our little girl the evening of her birth. It was a Sunday morning here that I will never forget.


Anonymous said...

ashleigh, you don't know me, but I've been blessed by reading your blog this afternoon. I saw the link in the church bulletin this morning.
we adopted our oldest when she was 2 (stateside) and I identify with so many of your emotions throughout your journey. i am sure that you are right and God laid Lydia and her birth parents on your heart that morning in January. SO amazing.

We counted back to the day we started trying to conceive and it was the same month our precious daughter was conceived by her birthmother. God intended her for us and we just didn't know His plan. (I wasn't very patient waiting on His plan... ;-))
Anyway, as so many others have said, thank you for your honesty.