12.22.2008

dust cloud

i have always thought highly of teachers. now that i have small people who are in their classes, i think that they should be living in mansions and vacationing on their yachts.

15 days until school is back in session. if i ever had thoughts of home-schooling (which i haven't except for when i wonder if i would kill or be killed)i have confirmed that i am not called to that arena of education. praise jesus for public school. i don't care how much is wrong with them, this person is thanking God for free, quality, out-of-my-house education.

so, today was the official first day of CHRISTMAS break (just wanted to make sure everyone knows that we are off for CHRISTMAS, not winter). around 10:00 i realized i better get a plan...quick. there is a reason why we belong to the pool in the summer. 4 high energy kids in a relatively small house makes for fun...right? right.

off to the mall we went. upon entering dillards i had one woman look at me and start laughing. i am not sure why except that at that point the kids probably could have been heard by the old ladies in the upstairs lingerie department. did i mention our kids are a little loud? quick, be quiet, try and stifle their christmas excitement at least until we pass the snooty rich women shopping for jewelry in dillards.

then we went to Gap (my favorite store in case you are looking for gifts). i had to do a price adjustment, which was the whole reason we went to the mall. and for those who don't know about price adjustments, they are God's gift to frugal and thrifty, hoping to be fashionable, women. before i went to the register i of course had to look around for any great deals.

josiah, "mooom, this is boring. can you hurry up."
anna claire, "josiah, fashion takes time."

i am not kidding. she really said that. i thought i was going to pee in my pants.

then it was off to mcdonalds at the food court. special treat in our house. order, sit down, get everyone situated with their food..."moooommmyy. i have to pee." and when lydia says she has to go, i better get her there. now what is one to do? i had four kids with their lunch on the table. it wasn't like we were almost finished. we had JUST sat down. so my options are take lydia to the bathroom and leave the three by themselves (WHO would do THAT?) or, bag up all their food, take everyone to the bathroom (which would take about 5 times as long) and then get back to the table with cold food. i won't tell you what i did. let's just say i am hoping social services doesn't make a visit tomorrow thanks to an anonymous tipster.

so then we went to old navy, my other favorite store. i knew i was taking a risk but all of their stuff was 60% off or more and then i go back in two weeks after christmas and get a price adjustment and i can get all of ac's clothes for next year for $1.99! well worth a little chaos. that was relatively uneventful except for the herding cats that was continually happening. i swear that store just breeds loudness and raucous behavior in children.

then, we headed out to the van. we walked nicely through the mall. mother duck and all her ducklings walking behind (by now the stroller was full of bags). we got to dillards where we were parked, walked past the snooty jewelry section (there must be bermuda triangleness around there) and i stop to look behind and make sure everyone is following. just imagine...

micah is on the floor. face down. sweatshirt hood up over his head. josiah is dragging him by the hood. pulling him along as he screams - which i couldn't hear because his face was mopping the floor. oh my gosh! what in the world are you doing?
"he wouldn't come so i was trying to help."

right, okay. maybe we need to have a talk about appropriate encouragement techniques.

you know, it's never a dull moment in our house. and as much as there is chaos that follows us like Pigpen's dust cloud, so does the joy of children. and that, my friends, is why we would love to have another one. the joy is unspeakable. not necessarily unhearable...

3 comments:

Amy said...

You don't know me, and I usually just lurk. But this made me laugh so hard that I cried. And I couldn't stop. I think it made my life seem a little more sane, since everywhere we go I get the "Please control your children" look. I can totally see this happening in my life. Thank you !!!

Jill Johnson said...

Oh how I needed that laugh today. I think you are my role model as I am having trouble controlling one (and the mall - it's not a pretty scene) and wonder how God could ever send me back for more. Ever thought of filling Erma Bombeck's shoes? :)

Marie Foote said...

AWESOME, Ashleigh. =) I think Anna Claire and my Megan would get along grandly. Like you, I treasure the chaos ... because one day they'll be gone having chaos of their own to manage - and to be grateful for!

Thanks for sharing ...
Marie Foote